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THE ILLUMINATI - THE SCENTED GARDEN OF ABDULLAH THE SATIRIST OF SHIRAZ |
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THE SERVITORS OF BEELZEBUB ALCANOR A light-flash. Perhaps bird-like -- swallow or dove. AMATIA A very black snake, wormy and wriggly. BILIFARES A great toad with a black head. LAMARION A donkey-headed beast the size of a spaniel with a long twisted tail. DIRALISEN A snake with six feet. Its head is like that of an enormous ferret, and the eyes very red. LICAMEN A very small long-eared monkey. DUNIRAG Like a sheep with the mange. It has straight horns and four black legs; the wool is in knots and patches. ELPONEN A whitish long-haired mouse. ERGAMEN A big black hairy spider. GOTIFAN A bat of light colour and red mixed. NIMORUP A stunted dwarf with large head and ears. His lips are greeny bronze and slobbery. CARELENA A long beaked owl, very big, grey, with no feathers. LAMALON Has human feet, thin legs, and a skinny body; the head is huge and a goats, the arms long and skinny. IGURIM Has a crocodiles head, a smooth fish's body, with white belly. Long is its tail and tapering, and it hath no feet but brownish fins. AKIUM Is a long-bodied black sphinx. DORAK Is a very misshapen monkey, of slate colour. The hands are very
human, as also the ears. The body is like a woman. IKONOK A very black toad with bright red eyes and much gold on his salient points. KEMAL A big bird, pigeons head, grey. The wings are very long with rosy tips. BILICO Skeleton in front of Set Beast's face. TROMES An enormous black beetle with lobsterlike mandibles. BALFORI A 7-pointed white star, with one point very long. AROLEN Enormous green locust. LICROCHI A cat's head, a dachshunds body, a long tufted tail. Browny-yellow, dead looking. NOMINON A large red spongy jellyfish with one greenish luminous spot. Like a nasty mess. IAMAI A small light crested yellow bird, iridescent under the throat. AROGOR A black vulture with human ears, a very long beak, and very red eyes. HOLASTRI An enormous pink bug. HACAMUBI A monkey, black, with long hair and a white face. SAMALO An altogether black undersized ram with very long curling horns lying back along its back. PLISON Has two very thin legs, a black big belly, and arms stretched up and behind its very large and long seal's head. The mouth is human and enormous. RADERAF Has a rhinoceros' head, but the roof of the head is cut off. He hath no body or legs. BOROL An erect serpent coiled, with a crowned flat head. SOROSINA Like a lamb pierced from right shoulder to back with an arrow. Lamb (sideways on) lying down. CORILLON Is very strong, having the paws and body of a couchant lion. But its face is a woman's with her hair like an Egyptian Queen's. GRAMON Is a tortoise of light colour with a knobby shell. MAGALAST Like a very small green frog with a red, 4-pointed star on his head. ZAGALO A big frog, green with dull yellow spots. It hath a rattail, very long. PELLIPIS Like a red flaming tapering Rod, with notches at the thick end. NATALIS A small black gnome. In his left hand is a grey pedestal surmounted by a white pyramid. NAMIROS Is formless, like a flood of yellow light more brilliant than the sun. ADIRAEL A very large gold fish with an enormous head. KABADA Is a fat frog, erect, with a green white chest. KIPOKIS A small figure, fox-headed, extending its left hand. ORGOSIL A very dark and very large tortoise. ARCON A smallish nude human bony figure. It has a square head with three large plumes. AMBOLON A hunched-up rabbit squatted on a pedestal. LAMOLON An enormous snail of very deep blue. BILIFOR An erect serpent with a flat head pointing forward.} {Footnote 4. Chesed and Jesod.} {Footnote 5. Cf. a `windy and watering moon' in "Atalanta".} {Footnote 6. Tiphereth.} {Footnote 7. Binah. That is, in Man's innocence his devotion enables him to commune with all the Gods except Kether, the supreme. The symbols are identical with those of the Hebrews and the Bohemians.} The Innocence and Reputation of Man III THE AMBASSADORS White ships come over the sea from the Sultan of Ind; {FN1} it is their mission to enquire about the reputation of thy podex, O Habib! Caravans of camels, laden with presents, come from Damascus and Samarkand, Bukhara and Baghdad; for rich men and men of war, {FN2} princes and amirs, wise men and even holly mullahs, having heard of the black-violet {FN3} mole upon thy buttocks, cannot endure the sweet pain, and lay all their homage below those twin crescents, thy curving feet, like the tusks of a young elephant. But no crone in Shiraz can seduce thee, O virtuous one! Thou openest, it is true, thy podex, which appears like the sun through a dissolving mist upon Friday, {FN4} but it is only to admit the dragon of El Qahar. Then there is an eclipse {FN5} of all things: Allah is the uniter. {FN6} {Footnote 1. About as vague a personage as we find in Mandeville, Malory, or Moore. It is a curious literary phenomenon that in all countries poets *will* talk about "Cashmere" and "Cathay" and so on without the smallest fact to guide them. Yet there is a certain consistency in the conception.} {Footnote 2. [Arabic] Ghazi warrior; sometimes used only of one who has slain an infidel. A common piece of mild chaff to a harlot (male or female) is: "Why have you stuck rouge ([Arabic] Ghaza) on your face? In order to stick a Ghazi to your bottom!"} {Footnote 3. Black-violet: so in text [Arabic]. A black mole, in Sufi cipher, means the "point of indivisible unity". But El Haji more scandalously and obviously chooses the podex itself throughout most of his masterpiece.} {Footnote 4. Friday. This appears at first sight an obvious misreading. But (if you please) Mahbub says: "When a boy opens his podex, the hairs depart one from another like true believers quitting the mosque on Friday. [Arabic] (mist) also means a worm in Arabic and the passage implies that all Arabs have tape-worms!" As is well known, they pay respect to Abu Bekr and Omar, and make things very hot for the Arami every year at Mecca. The dragon is of course the universal one; Rahu in India; Caput Draconis and Cauda Draconis in the West, famed in Astrology as the powers of the Eclipse. But I personally support the misreading theory for [Arabic] though I can offer no conjectural restoration. The text makes nonsense, and Abdullah, with all his puns and eccentricities, rarely does this. (In Morocco the appearance of hair on face or privates utterly disqualifies a boy for pathic.)} {Footnote 5. [Arabic] This is one of El Haji's "portmanteau" words. He will not specify [Arabic] (solar) or [Arabic] (lunar) eclipse; so calmly invented a word with the third possible guttural to include all kinds!] {Footnote 6. From the Q'uran. Used however to *reject* amorous advances, as they say "Allah is bountiful" to a beggar, meaning "I am not". But here it is meant seriously, or at worst to imply; "This is a very disgraceful conduct -- let us blame it on Allah"!} The Pleasure God hath in Man IV AFLATUN {FN1} Habib I sing, whose heart enslaving kun
{FN2} {Footnote 1. Aflatun -- Plato.} {Footnote 2. Kun [Arabic] anus.} {Footnote 3. Ruknabad -- A streamlet of Persia near Shiraz (Forbes).} {Footnote 4. Dijirid. A ring at which Arabs tilt at full gallop. It is our Western "tent pegging" or the medieval "quintain", this latter perhaps brought by the Crusaders from Syria. (Tilting the ring? Ed.)} {Footnote 5. Light -- Tune. Trancendental phenomena known to the practical mystic.} External Religion betrayeth man to Fate CV THE DEBAUCH Wine is red, and so are thy lips; what wonder then if El Qahar is doubly intoxicated? Thy mouth brims over with laughter at the antics of thy lover, so that in thy mirth thy podex also brims over. {FN1} Then the guests cry shame; and fall down with laughing, until the feast is disordered and becomes a debauch, so that the decorous are embarrassed. So drunk am I, however, that I shamelessly demand thy love before them all. Then the officers rush in and lead us before the Qazi. {FN2} But while I am punished, thou, the author of my offence, art bidden to sup. Go not, O sweet Habib! that ass-calibred Jew {FN3} is as unsuited to thy tender podex as the elephant to the nightingale. By Allah, I say go not! 'twere shame, when thou returnest, that thou shouldst seem to thine El Qahar like Hatim Tai's {FN4} tunic to that Allah-forgotten hunchback {FN5} Ali Bukhti. {FN6} {Footnote 1. To break wind is the worst breach of good taste possible to a Musalman. Witness the famous story translated by Burton.} {Footnote 2. Qazi -- magistrate.} {Footnote 3. It is exceedingly doubtful whether an actual Jew would be permitted to hold office, even if converted to Islam. The term is probably simple abuse. Ass-membered (khar nafsar, [Arabic]) is with most Persian writers a compliment. El Haji had certainly never heard the English rime "A gentleman's pin is long and thin"; yet he appears to share the prejudice, probably from personal reasons.} {Footnote 4. Hatim Tai. The Hercules of Persia, though his feasts are more famous than his stature. But here the bulk is clearly the important thing.} {Footnote 5. Hunchback -- not merely an unfortunate, but a bad man. Witness "Expect 42 ills from the cripple, and 80 from the one-eyed man; but when the hunchback arrives, say Allah help us!"} {Footnote 6. Bukhti is the two-humped camel of Bactria. Ali is therefore the fellow's name; Bukhti his laqab or nickname -- which none escape.} The Impotence of Thought to Perceive Reality VI THE CURTAIN Thy podex like a rose, within {Footnote 1. The very cause of life -- desire -- is that which hinders its attaining to higher planes. A Buddhist and by no means a Mohammedan doctrine. I am a little uncertain of my translation. Literally [Arabic].} {Footnote 2. Cf. Verlaine -- c'est a reccomencer. But "beginning" is here "maruk" [Arabic] not "rashid"; and Mahbub says that here is a punning reference to Marut [Arabic] (any connection with the Sanskrit Martus?) and Harut, who are the Persian "Beni Elohim" going in to the daughters of men. To punish them, Allah hung them by their heels in a well at Babylon, where they wile away the time by giving magical instruction. The meaning therefore (argal!) of the whole passage is that unredeemed (i.e. uninitiated) man, however ordinarily devout, is liable to become a sorcerer! I cannot help thinking that Mahbub must have been hung up by his heels at one time: nobody could ever think all that out right way up!} The Unity of God VII THE DUSTSTORM I was excessively drunk yesterday in the house of Husein; {FN1} thou didst appear to me (for there is no might nor any potency save in the Almighty!) {FN2} as having two podices like suns on the horizon in a duststorm; and four buttocks, shaking in a confused manner. Therefore did I take council with Husein-i-Abdul {FN1} as to what it were fitting to do; and he bade me look upon my member; whether it were one or two. Now then my eyes gave the lie to my hand; but rushing upon thee like a bull, I did penetrate to the core of thy being; and great joy overcoming me I fell down, assured that there was but one. Thus it is with the unbeliever {FN3} and his three gods; but whoso knoweth Allah knoweth Him to be one. For all that, Habib, it is a great pity that thou art not double as to thy podex; I could more easily understand and excuse thy filthy dealings with the one-eyed Nubian yesterday. Of a surety thou stinkest yet of his sweat; go wash thyself before thou comest wooing to El Qahar. Nay, darling, come now, and as thou art; I love thee, wert thou the bedfellow of every hog in Iran. {Footnote 1. Husein -- possibly represents the mystic teacher or Guru of the poet. The Nubian is perhaps Satan or the "Evil Genius". Abdul means Saints or Hermits, but also a class of being spoken of in the Oracles of Zoroaster as "Intelligibles", "Empyrean Rulers"; in short, Viceroys of the Demiourgos. They are the Mahayana "Dhyana-Buddhas" and the modern planetary gods Arathron, Bethor, Phaleg, Och, Hagith, Ophiel, Phul. The curious may consult Cornelius Agrippa for further details.} {Footnote 2. A common expression of surprise or shock. In such a connection it here becomes (to the Persian mind, at least) intensely ludicrous. As in the story of the King who climbed the wall (in the other "Scented Garden" -- Ed.) where this form of jest is carried to its limit.} {Footnote 3. Unbeliever, i.e. the Christian, who ranks in Islam with the idolater and the polytheist.} The Infidelity and Ingratitude of Man VIII THE WHORE Art thou one or many, {FN1} Habib? Surely thou hast need to be a thousand, since thou hast taken to prostituting thyself to Hindus and Afghans, Nubian slaves and immodest boys from Bushir. {FN2} When they saw thee of old, with thy tunic hanging upon thy jutting buttocks, like the flowing draperies of the Caliph's tent, men said of thee: "The complexions of the women are well shaded from the sun". Now it is thin and transparent, that tunic of thine, and people are saying: "Please Allah it may not rain, else will the horses catch cold and die!" {FN3} Every gossip comes to me and prates of thy misdemeanours; my beard waves with anger like an old goat's. Come to me, and I will beat thee soundly; and if thou offendest again, I will carry thee before this ass-calibred Qazi -- Allah on him! -- I know well what punishment he will give thee -- love; but ever after thou shalt have no need to be a thousand, but accomodate thirty lovers at one time within thy podex. So saith El Qahar, but I am not so sure that if thou comest to him with thine impudence and prettiness, he will not forgive thee. Allah is the Forgiver. {FN4} {Footnote 1. In reference to the problems of Greek philosophy, I may refer students to Erdmann's History of Philosophy for an adequate and noble discussion of this fascinating theme.} {Footnote 2. Hindus, etc. The sins of the soul. Cf. Ezekiel XVI and XXIII -- indeed the whole symbolism of the Hebrew prophets.} {Footnote 3. Meaning that his buttocks are now public; like a serai; while before they were private, like a harem.} {Footnote 4. From the Q'uran. But possibly a threat equalling "God may forgive you but I never will", as our demi-virgin Astrea Redux told the treacherous Countess.} The Results of Sin IX THE HAKIM {FN1} Thy breast smells of all the jasmine in Iran, Habib, just as thy podex has the essence of all its roses. But it is too much like the bosom of a woman. Though thy buttocks are like nargis, they are no longer firm. This is because thou lingerest in bawdy talk in taverns, drinking forbidden liquors; because thou dalliest all day with that camel backed monocular from Nubia. He serveth thee without remission from the Wolf's Tail {FN2} to the Evening Star, O thou eaten with beastliness! and for this thou forgettest the manly games of youth. When I first had thee, thou wast like a young deer, bounding over the grassy plains; now thou waddlest like a gravid she-ass. Puffy are thy cheeks and bloated, just as if the moon were turned by a sorcerer into a putrid cheese. {FN3} Fie! thou art surely bewitched by this ugly fellow, with his lips like rotten bananas. {FN4} Because he has a member like an ass, why shouldst thou be in conduct like a mule? I shall anoint myself with camel's dung, and drink many decoctions of chob-chini, {FN5} since nothing appeases thee but male vigour. Alas! thou carest no more for riding, but only for tippling; Firdausi {FN6} pleases thee not, nor the Ghazals of thine El Qahar. {FN7} Thou art but an hog wallowing in Nubian mire; thou art fat; thou stinkest; thy voice is getting like a jackal's while thy podex is no more elastic than a ten year old wineskin; in three years thou wilt be as foul as thy Nubian. Come into my garden, boy! with true love and pure, with open air and swift riding thou mayest regain thy beauty. Then wilt thou be grateful to El Qahar, and faithful, if thou canst be faithful. The camel that hath learnt to bite furiously {FN8} -- only Allah and the muzzle {FN9} avail. {Footnote 1. [Arabic] Hakim -- doctor, not to be confused with [Arabic] Hakim -- official.} {Footnote 2. Wolf's Tail -- the false dawn, or zodiacal light.} {Footnote 3. One MS. omits the sentence, and finishes the previous couplet "O flabby and withered lips!" [Arabic] "lips of one who fasts".} {Footnote 4. Probably a pun. [Arabic] to kiss. [Arabic] rotten.} {Footnote 5. Reputed aphrodisiacs. In reality of little more use than the boasted South American Damiana. Chob-chini (wood of China) is the "ginseng" of Sze-Chuen and Corea. The modern biological methods of restoring sexual vigour are interesting. Brown-Sequard prepared a testicualar infusion, but his was not found -- everywhen, everywhere, and by all, a success. Today they kill a goat, obtain the semen while the animal is still not quite dead, and preserve by a special process. Such a decoction, even when a year old, exhibits live and active spermatazoa when warmed by an experienced microscopist on the stage of a good instrument. Injected under the skin, it produces magnificent results, both as a general tonic and a cure for impotence. Thus the goat, deposed from his satanic glory, and proved (like a young virgin) useless in gonorrhea, has at last found his causa finalis in the laboratories of Chicago. (The following addition to the above note was communicated to me by the able and learned M. Merryweather of Armours). ORCHITIC TESTICULAR SUBSTANCE Prepared from the testicles of the ram. The value of the orchitic substance is stated to be assured in the treatment of well-defined cases, particularly in cerebral depression, failure of reproductive power, premature senility, nervous asthenia, neurasthenia etc. In these complaints, the employment of the Orchitic substance gives good results by stimulating the nervous system, by increasing the power of work, and also the secretions, the proportions of haemoglobin and the vital resistance, etc. Such results are partially explained by the chemical composition of the Orchitic extracts which are extremely rich in organic phosphorus. The results are similar to those obtained by the use of Glycero-Phosphates and Lecithins. Preparations -- Orchitic desiccated powder (Armour). One part is equal to 80 parts of the raw material packed in one ounce bottles at 2/6d. Orchitic Tablets (Armour). Each tablet contains 2 grains of the dessicated substance packed in bottles of 100 tablets at 1/6d.} {Footnote 6. Firdausi, the epic poet of Persia.} {Footnote 7. Some MSS. end with this Takhallus. But this title seems hardly justified without what follows. At the same time, it must be remembered that the titles are all probably of late insertion and for convenience of reference only.} {Footnote 8. According to Mahbub, this is an attack on the Q'uran. (He being like so many Persians today not only a Sufi, but a follower in a sect of El Baab, delights to point out these things.) For furious [Arabic] is a pun on [Arabic] Salir, a prophet, who converted some of the Thamud tribe by producing a camel from a stone. (Q'uran Cap. VII) But even so the joke is not obvious to my mind.} {Footnote 9. Very like Cromwell's famous retort to the officer who asked if his puritans should engage in prayer, as the enemy might attack at any moment. "Of a surety; and bid them keep well dry their powder".} The Reproaches of God X THE BLACK STONE I have kissed the Black Stone of the Ka'abah, {FN1} O Habib! but a thousand times the black mole upon thy buttocks. I have seen a thousand men kiss the black stone of the Ka'abah; but I hear that the pilgrims to thy house are even more numerous than the Hujjaj. {FN2} Omar {FN3} was an ass; but he is buried -- Allah curse him! -- at El Medinah; only those with members like an ass find any permanent resting place in the mosque. His {FN4} member is firmer than a rock, sayest thou? But I will bottle and drown him. {FN5} It is disgraceful, Habib, that thou lettest that lousy little tailor into thy secret beauties; but I suppose thou needest his needle and thread to repair the rents made by thy boasted Qazi. Often have I sung thy podex as the sun, and of a surety he shineth upon all. Thy gait is the gait of a gravid sow; thou admittest every hog in Iran to thy sty; beware, sayeth El Qahar, lest thou bring forth a litter of pigs! {FN6} {Footnote 1. Ka'abah -- the Holy Place at Mecca. See Burton's Pilgrimage for a long description of this and of the Black Stone.} {Footnote 2. Hujjaj -- plural of Haji, a pligrim to Mecca.} {Footnote 3. Omar -- See Burton's Pilgrimage for facts about this caliph, highly honoured by the orthodox Muslim, but detested by the `Arami' (Persians) who ever seek to defile his tomb, often risking their lives in the attempt. Frequent is the pun between Omar and Hhumar "ass". They are spelt nearly alike [Arabic] and [Arabic] and Persian pronunciation always slurs the difference between "ma'ajub" and "ma'aruf" o and u.} {Footnote 4. Whose? Presumably the Nubian's; but the text is ambiguous.} {Footnote 5. A pun. [Arabic] means both "rock" and a jinn who offended King Solomon. The latter (as usual) imprisoned him in a brass globe and threw him into the sea.} {Footnote 6. All this is so much the more insulting as the woman and the pig are such unclean beasts. See Frazer "Adonis, Attis, Osiris" Book I. Cap. IV p. 36 in reference to a shrine of Hercules at Gades (Cadiz) an early Tyrian colony. "Neither women nor pigs might pollute the holy Place by their presence". So that we need not attribute the Mohammedan viewpoint to the Inspiration of Allah; others had noticed it before.} The Falsity of the Frank XI AZIZ {FN1} Of what have I sung, Habib? Of thy love. Of what do I sing now? Of thy
faithfulness. Yet as the podex of Aziz is inferior to thy podex, {FN3} both because it has two fistulae, and because it lacks thy heat, dryness and tightness, so also is the God of the Christian inferior to Allah, both because he has two cogods, and because he hath neither the power, the wisdom, nor the compassion of Him who is alone without equal, son, or companion. {FN4} Whether He exist or no, whether He love him or no, El Qahar will love Him and sing His praises. {FN5} {Footnote 1. Aziz is a generic term -- darling, sweetheart, etc., almost the French mignon, with a subcurrent of meaning -- pathic. Joseph (ibn Yakub) says Palmer, is called "aziz i mist" implying that he was Pharaoh's catamite; and his behaviour towards Potiphar's wife is applauded in Persia not as virtue but as policy. But Platt attributes the title to Potiphar himself. (Q'uran XII "Joseph".) I think he is wrong.} {Footnote 2. Affirms the subjective value of devotion. Cf. Fuller "The Star in the West", who speaks of "concious communication with God on the part of an Atheist" -- and so on.} {Footnote 3. Again Habib represents Allah; the constant interchange is very confusing, and to Western minds a great blemish on the poem. But the childish sublety of the Eastern mind regards this as a "veil" preventing the unbeliever from penetrating the allegory.} {Footnote 4. Q'uran CXII. Cf. Browning (Ring and Book, The Pope) for these 3 qualities.} {Footnote 5. Affirms the subjective value of Devotion.} The Wages of Sin XII THE APPLES In my garden are seven kinds of apples; {FN1} and there are seven kinds of louse {FN2} on the once velvet buttocks of my Habib. The smooth whiteness is now become a red roughness; he is spotted like a leper. He is no more fit for the desire of a clean man; even his seducers, the black-skinned swine! having found a boy with tulip cheeks and coralline; and a bosom of jessamine; and eyebrows like Karenian {FN3} bows for beauty of line; and breath like wine; and buttocks fair and firm and fine; and a podex like a ruby mine; have cast him off. {FN4} Until Shahrava {FN5} return he will no more pass current. Let him buy a dildo, for his cry for members is ceaseless as the jackal's! Nay! But come to me, Habib! I will cherish thee as my life; I will take thee in my garden and love thee ever as of old. El Qahar will make new songs for thee, till thy fame standeth for ever among men, as the sun standeth in the sky, not to be denied. {FN6} So sayeth El Qahar. {Footnote 1. Often the case in Persia.} {Footnote 2. Often the case in Persia.} {Footnote 3. Karenian -- proverbial expression. (Write this up fully). (Major Lutiy did not live long enough to accomplish this intention; and we cannot trace the phrase. Possibly it is more Indian that Persian. Ed.)} {Footnote 4. This passage menas that "the devil always leaves you in the lurch" as Spurgeon said. However devoted one may be to vice, sooner or later it tires and gives no more pleasure. The same is of course true of virtue; but to the mystic, virtue, as such, is itself vice. Cf. "All your righteousness is as filthy rags".} {Footnote 5. Shahrava. A king who forced a leather currency on his subjects. Dildos in Persia being usually made of leather, the jest is double edged. To present a dildo, or anything which might by any possibility be used as such, to a courtesan is a deadly insult, implying "You cannot attract a live man", and she will assuredly have you murdered sooner or later if she can.} {Footnote 6. A proverb and a pun [Arabic] denial [Arabic] splendour.} The Pangs of Repentance XIII THE BLIND BEGGAR Thou hast come back to me Habib! but in sooth thou art a sorry sight! Fifteen {FN1} years since thy birth in Iran; yet thy flesh hangs on thee like his old clothes on Abdullah {FN2} the blind beggar. Seven days did the barber and the druggist toil upon thee; but thy foulness clings like musk. Also I have been put to great charges for thee, having shut thee up to purge and salivate. {FN3} But oh! how that drooppeth that was straighter than a young palm! Furthermore thou poutest, bemoaning thy Nubian that I have not his vigour. Thou whose podex has become like the twat of one sixty years an whore! {FN4} Therefore, I will put thee in my harem for the filthy slut thou art; the eunuchs shall beat thee soundly before the women; and this night I will go in to Laila, {FN5} whom most thou hatest of all my concubines. While thou was away, I wooed thee with soft words and lamentations; now I have my will of thee, I will treat thee with great severity. So also doth Allah entreat kindly the wicked; and upon the just raineth the plagues. For thy desertion, Habib, and this thy ingratitude doth El Qahar give praise to the beloved One. {Footnote 1. Again a long explanation from Mahbub. The soul (he says) falls from 66 [Arabic] to 45 [Arabic] Adam, man. Then the twofold head of the dragon-camel divides it into 3 equal portions 45 [divided by] 3 = 15. But God transfixes the dragon-camel with an arrow (Samech 60 "Temperance" the 15th letter of the alphabet) and 60 + 45 = 105 = 21 x 5, or the Perfect Crown 3 x 7 [Arabic] in the 5 quarters of the perfected Man, the Cross replaced by the Pentagram.} {Footnote 2. Abdullah -- the unredeemed man; Cf. Rev. III. 17.} {Footnote 3. A common medical practice in the East.} {Footnote 4. The worst of insults. The great excuse for the podex is its superior tightness -- supposing that the Persians thought an excuse necessary.} {Footnote 5. Laila -- perhaps the Evil Jinn. Laila means "night"; and Lilith is the chief of the succubi, much feared by good Muslims. It was reserved for Mr. Thomas Lake Harris and his English dupe Berridge to cultivate of set purpose this abominable and disgusting variety of masturbation.} The Shame of the Prodigal XIV THE COMPARISONS O Habib, I have compared thy figure to the cypress, and to a thousand other beautifully shapen things. Also I have said that thine eyes were like the sun for splendour; and like the gazelle's eyes for depth and softness; many other things very well composed have I sung concerning thee. {FN1} I have even compared the perfume of thy podex to that of the rose, and I take Allah to witness that this is not so, except by favour of him in whom all is One. {FN2} I was faithful and diligent in love, and worshipped thee above all save Him to whom alone worship is due. Thou didst cast me off for thy filthy lovers -- Allah forget them! -- and now thou comest back thou thinkest still to play the master. No, by Allah! thy podex doth not resemble the rose, or another flower; it resembles nothing but a podex, the podex of a peevish and filthy sodomite. When thou didst veil thy buttocks with the spangled muslin of Egypt, we cried out that it was the face of Allah radiant through the stars of night -- for we were excessively drunk, Habib! -- But yesterday we laughed even louder when my women veiled thee as to thy face with a black veil, and Laila cried "Allah be praised, the Concealer, that He hath permitted us to conceal the podex of this pig." Thou didst not laugh, O spoiler of sport! Nor did the rattans of the eunuchs move thee to mirth, falling like the first hard rain of summer upon thy back, and upon thy buttocks, and upon thy feet, Thou art no longer cheerful; Laila in the night bade me observe that in thy song, which thou sangest to the eunuchs, there was a note as of pain. Is it because thou hast not eaten for three days that thou hast lost thy good spirits? Or wast thou ashamed, shooting the peppercorns? {FN3} No. by Allah, for thou hast no shame. It may be because I have clothed the male ass of Abdullah the tailor in costly trappings and made him pass throughout the whole city in charge of the pimp Mohammed Shaib the Maghraby, {FN4} saying: "I go to fetch Habib from the house of El Qahar as a beautiful bride to this my master Khar-i-zakar-i-asal". {FN5} The people of this city are laughing, Habib; it is at thee! Even thy Nubian called out in the Bazaar: "Beware, O presumptious one! Remember the ass that fell into the pit!" {FN6} I love thee, Habib; and that none the less that thou hast cured me of my folly for thee. I am the master, and thou the slave. See to it that thou be the slave of love, {FN7} then wilt thou live ever happily with El Qahar, the despiser of Shahrava. {FN8} {Footnote 1. This passage is a clever parody on a well known Ghazal of Hafiz.} {Footnote 2. That is to say, phenomena are all alike to who perceives the Noumenon.} {Footnote 3. To amuse oneself at the expense of another, one may fill his rectum with peppercorns, and apply a pinch of pepper to the nose. This causes the peppercorns to shoot forth, often noisily.} {Footnote 4. The Shaib are of the famous Riff tribe. The Moors are considered a very wild and boisterous crew, but very good-tempered. They are the Irish of Islam. Burton is, I think, a little hard on them when he writes: "what conscience has the murderous Moor, who slays his guest with felon blow?"} {Footnote 5. Ass of the member of honey. [Arabic] So Mahbub's expansion of the "portmanteau" text [Arabic] Khazk'asal.} {Footnote 6. Refers to a fable. An elephant had fallen into a pit, but managed to scramble out. Seeing an ass going in that direction, he kindly warned him. The ass disdainfully replied that he, being light, ran little danger. Ay! said the elephant, but small and without an hand, how wilt thou escape if thou *dost* fall? And in fact the ass fell and perished miserably. (I think if far more likely that it refers to another fable, the following, told by Persians against Omar and Ayeshah who as the daughter of Abu Bekr is supposed by the Shiahs to have influenced Mohammed's conduct for evil. There are numerous scandals concerning her. Yet the more decent Persian tells the story of Zuleikah (Potiphar's wife) and of Joseph. A certain dog meeting an ass, greeted him cheerfully. "Why this glee, brother dog?" "Passing near a dunghill, (probably Abubekr's house is intended) I met a beautiful virgin named Ayesha who is as firm and as tight as it is impossible to believe." The ass trots off, all on fire, but suddenly falls headlong into a deep pit. He is about to bear witness that there is no God but God, and that Mohammed is his Prophet (i.e. about to resign himself to death), when he is lifted out by a woman's hand and set on solid earth again. "O ass! how dost thou dare awaken Ayeshah the promised wife of the Prophet of Allah?" "O Ayeshah! I met a certain dog, who bore witness that thou wast tighter than it is possible to believe, the liar!" "Verily, o ass, but Omar hath passed by since then." Ed.)} {Footnote 7. The same phrase is used in the story of this name in Alf Laylah wa Laylah. Possibly some satire is concealed; but my munshi failed to make me see the joke.} {Footnote 8. Shahrava was a despot who forced leather money into circulation. The passage means, according to Mahbub, that El Qahar will not use a leather dildo, but his own stout member, upon the podex of Habib; but I prefer to think that he simply means "I will not beat thee" i.e. with leather thongs. In all countries beating is jestingly spoken of as "payment". Besides, the whole ode concerns active punishment, not mere deprivation of pleasure. (See note to XII. Ed.)} The Pains and Pleasures of Redemption XV THE COMPLAISANCES It is a pleasure to be thy tutor, {FN1} Habib; thou learnest swiftly, and (I think) wilt not soon forget. When thou camest in to me at night thou wast all in tears; and clasping my feet didst moan exceedingly, and beseech pity. Yet when I smote thy buttocks with the whip, bidding thee be cheerful, thou didst rise instant with laughter and smiles. Thou didst put on thy old provoking coquetry; though for many days thou hadst drunk nothing but water, thou didst comport thyself as one in whom the wine first blusheth. {FN2} Also when my love revived for thee a little, thou didst not immodestly thrust out thy buttocks, and show bare a gaping and hungry podex. On the contrary, thou wast like a young girl, and there was much shame when thy hand led the camel to the well. {FN3} Also there was embarrassment for thee when I bade thee act as thou didst act with thy Nubian; since, if thou didst too well, I should reproach thee with wantonness; but if ill, with coldness. So I praise thee that thou didst murmur that "Allah hath neither equal, son, nor companion; {FN4} how wilt thou, master, that I act with thee?" Then I forgave thee, and love utterly revived, so that calling for wine, we debauched together for three days and nights. The debauch exceeded even all that I have ever done with thee or another. {FN5} But thou art a fool, Habib, thou thoughtest that I was angry with thee. Never, by Allah! Nor, though He plagueth His lovers, is He ever wroth against them. So eagerly did I kiss every red weal upon thy velvet buttocks that thou didst wish thy beating had been prolonged by a whole day. Also, for every peppercorn that did shoot from thy podex, thou hadst a balm. Wise art thou who badest me sell this my garden to buy more pepper therewithal. {FN6} Repine not, therefore, O man! at the chastisements of Allah! Each of these will He a thousandfold repay. And the pain that I suffered at thine infidelities is well repaid by this love restored. Thou shalt never leave the side of El Qahar, and Laila shall be sold to Haroun the goatfaced Jew. {FN7} {Footnote 1. [Arabic] the word used here has the value of 180 which is 4 times 45, so it means that his Guardian Angel is on all sides of him. So Mahbub!} {Footnote 2. All this implies that by now the adept has acquired the complete control of his mind and senses. If a camel is shewn to the ordinary man, he is compelled to see a camel and cannot persuade himself that it is a house or an ox. If a drum is beaten near him, he is obliged to hear a drum, not a fife or a viol. But the adept can easily put himself out of gear with his senses, and awake others; as, for instance, he can awake the supernal taste by concentrating his thought upon the center of his tongue; hearing, upon the root; and touch, upon the tip.} {Footnote 3. There ought to be a proverb "You can lead the camel to the river; but you cannot make him swim" for impotence is in Persia, as everywhere, the penalty of age and excess. But as far as I know, there is not. {Footnote 4. The grave Persian literally screams with laughter whenever his poet quotes the Q'uran in a blasphemous sense; just as our own people with the Bible.} {Footnote 5. A last touch of the whip.} {Footnote 6. As a witty Irishman remarks, "There is only one argument that will convince a woman -- the argument in a circle".} {Footnote 7. A very profound allegory. Laila being the Jinn, this passage means that since the revelation of the Method of true communion between man and God, magic or dealings with the Jinn should be left to Jews (and other heathen), stigmatized as goatfaced because of their materialistic or gross views of the universe. The Haji was however accused of Christianizing tendencies on account of this passage, since Christians repressed Magic so severely, and in spite of his stout denials. To this day many singers "mak' siccar" of the approval of the orthodox by altering the words to "Christian Jew".} The First Joy of Union XVI THE JASMINE JAR I am a bearded and a turbaned sar;
{FN1} {Footnote 1. The Sanskrit root Sar ""head" has given to Europe and Asia the word for Ruler; as Sar, sir, sieur, Caesar, Sarah, Kaiser, Tsar, Shah, sirdar, sirkar, sire, signor, senor, seigneur and a host of others.} {Footnote 2. [Arabic] the temple at Mecca. But I think here it means the House not made with hands. The letter [Arabic] itself (not [Arabic] but the Hebrew [letter Beth]. Ed.) means house and connotes, (says Mahbub) a great Magus -- "The Magus of Power". The passage means therefore that mystic union is the key to Pracitical Magic.} {Footnote 3. This sort of individualization of ideas is common in Eastern literature. We had a bad attack of it ourselves with Thomas Haines Bayley and Co. "Though Custom may frown upon Boyhood and Beauty, And Ethics takes counsel with Prudence and Breeding, Morality smiles "But if Patience be Duty, Should Courage lament or Repentance lie bleeding?" And so though on Conscience's inviolate altar We strew the sad flowers of Repulsion and Shame, Religion and Justice must bid us not falter Till Purity mingles with Pleasure and Fame". You go on till your stock of abstract nouns is exhausted. (There is, the Qabalist may (perhaps too hypercritically) remark, a shade of lack of Equilibrium here. Why prefer the Near to the Far? Browning (Abt Vogler, IV) is better with his "Earth had attained to Heaven; there was no more near nor far". Yet even Browning in this passage discrimintaes against Earth in favour of Heaven: I suppose we are none of us perfect). {Footnote 4. Roses, etc. -- the cheeks, teeth, and lips.} {Footnote 5. I have heart the claim that the substance of porcelain can be so impregnated with perfume that "You may break, you may shatter -- etc." But I never saw a piece that withstood honest washing with hot soap and water; and I don't believe it.} The Origin of Evil XVII THE COMPLAINTS I am become like a skull at the feasts of my friends; {FN1} for no sooner am I pleased by anything than I am reminded of the excellencies of thy love, the perfections of thy podex. Upon these I discourse fluently, so that at last the guests are weary. Only last night I was bidden by Yusuf, {FN2} that ill-conditioned {FN3} bastard! to hide my head therein, if so I loved it; adding that, thanks to the Qazi, there would be no difficulty in performing the task. Both these reproaches are thy fault, Habib! O beautiful one! thou hast bewitched me and thou hast betrayed me. But as thy beauty excuses the former, so does thy return make an end of regret for the latter. Now am I aware of the wisdom of my tutor, who bade me weary not of the length of the Book; {FN4} but bade me praise the compassion of Allah, who made men evil that He and they might rejoice together at the end. {FN5} It is indeed the fact, O gazelle-eyed boy, that thy podex is excessively wide; but my member can fill it, pressing in to its length till the sun and moon are at rest upon the snow-hills. This (thou wilt remember) was not the case before thou didst forsake me. Thou mayest doubtless ask why, if such were the case, I did not cause thee to be violently enlarged by the eunuchs with diverse fruits. {FN6} 'Twould have given thee more pain, O boy of buttocks more beautiful than the peaches of Shiraz! Ask also, an thou wilt, why in the beginning I chose not a youth of vasty podex, having hips like a buffalo. Because the perfections of thy podex are perfect by reason of the imperfections of thy podex. {FN7} It is he who is lost in the darkness who rejoiceth at the rising of the moon. There are two laws, joy and sorrow, and they are twin babes feeding at the breast of Allah. Could El Qahar not rejoice in his sorrow, he would need sorrow in his joy. {FN8} {Footnote 1. This simile seems nigh universal; but in Persia it probably comes from Egypt rather than from India. Here the sense is of course altered.} {Footnote 2. Yusuf -- probably represents that class of persons who ridicule and slander the Mystic. The epithets seem to uphold such a conclusion.} {Footnote 3. Ill-conditioned -- The readings are here very various. We find ill-favored, ill-mannered, infamous, ill-starred, ill-doing and so on. So I chose a word wide enough to include them all.} {Footnote 4. The Q'uran. Many Moslems know it by heart throughout. The interior riming of so many of the chapters makes this task curiously easy, even to a stranger. I found that I could readily master any of the short chapters in an hour or so, while the acquirement of a dozen stray words would last me the whole day.} {Footnote 5. This attempt to reconcile all-Power and all-Benevolence is formally identical with that of the veriest Evangelical, and is none the less shamelessly casuistry for its Oriental phraseology.} {Footnote 6. This is a common practical joke among friends. The recalcitrant pathic is treated more severely by sharp tags on the coccyx with the knuckle, dagger hilt, or tent peg. Genuine obstinacy would lead to the slitting of the muscle, and the summoning of all bystanders to assist, each in his turn, at the resulting "sure thing".} {Footnote 7. All this seems curious, since tightness is such a desideratum. But I take it that the ideal condition is a close fit, like a kid glove; and of course one which needs much stretching is best.} {Footnote 8. All this is the orthodox Sufi method of explaining the origin of Evil, which, as monotheists, they are compelled to ascribe to Allah. We have much similar casuistry in the West.} The Peace, the Jealousy, and the Ecstacy of God XVIII THE TRYST There are no degrees in Allah, O boys with ears {FN1} like new moons! and there is no degree in the excellence of thy podex; nor is the joy of thy lover, when he delights therein, from day to day diminished or increased. This is the sigillum of perfection in any work. The perfect lover is calm and equable; storms of thunder, quakings of the earth, losses of goods, punishment from great men, none of these things cause him to rise from his divan, or to remove the silken tube of the rose-perfumed huqqa from his mouth. I can even take pleasure with Laila, O no longer jealous one! When thou was away from me, I was unable to regard her or her companions (the thunder-smitten bitches!) {FN2} without excessive sickness. It was for thy sake, o mischievous one! that I caused the eunuchs {FN3} to fornicate with Zuleikah in a painful manner, while I beat her with whips of hide. So that she became unconscious; and her reputation was of chastity and prudence. {FN4} Therefore, as to-night is full moon, I will acquaint thee with a certain cherry-tree that hangs over a cool reach of Ruknabad. Under its blossom we will sit in our boat and listen to the water. Go therefore and anoint thee with rose; and besmear thy podex with jasmine mixed with ambergris in oil; {FN5} for not until the dawn breaks will El Qahar withdraw his member. {FN6} The night is full of small breezes, blowing apple-blossoms hither and thither. All the stars will shine, and thou shalt have a caress for every star. But there is only one moon, and only once shall thy podex be invaded; for not until the dawn breaks will El Qahar withdraw his member. Even so that happy one, who is united with Allah, shall never leave Him; so the crimson of the West shall fade into the blue of the whole sky, and the blue be illumined by the streamers of the false dawn, which is like death as the true dawn is like the last day. {FN7} I hope, Habib, that thy podex is capable of a severe combat; for not until the dawn breaks will El Qahar withdraw his member. {Footnote 1. So our best M.S. [Arabic] But [Arabic] flesh -- meaning buttocks -- sounds more likely. Considerations of prosody support the text.} {Footnote 2. Meteor-struck: meteors are the stones flung by the angels at the Jinn who pry into Heaven. This epithet confirms our view of the allegory.} {Footnote 3. Eunuchs. Those from who the testicles only are removed can still copulate, and experience the sexual orgasm, though of course no fecundation results. Hence the possibility of Gibbon's remark that a certain lady "preferred the titillations of her favourite eunuch to the ponderous emballings of the Roman praetor"; and of Martial's epigram: "Cur tantum eunuchos habeat tua Gellia, quaeris, Pannice? vult frui Gellia, non parere".} {Footnote 4. This jest depends on the pun -- a somewhat significant one! -- between [Arabic] unconscious, stupefied and [Arabic] matron, a virtuous woman.} {Footnote 5. An excellent prescription. Olive oil is of course meant.} {Footnote 6. For the use of the refrain the reader may consult any manual on Persian prosody. El Haji has made several innovations.} {Footnote 7. How beautiful and touching are these similes! No artifice, no straining of the metaphor is involved; the poet rests in calm and beatific certitude of "a good death, and a joyful resurrection in His holy kingdom!" Yet there is no false piety, no arrogance; and like every straight-living man, he is capable of honest laughter, almost in the same breath.} |